By Rachael Taylor
This is one of my favorite topics to talk about, finding a way to love who you are and stop beating yourself up (because all that does is make you miserable).
As a health coach, I’m here as a resource to help you get healthier, push past sabotage and teach you the tools you need to build your happiest, healthiest self.
With that in mind, there is absolutely no reason you can’t love yourself exactly the way you are right now. And it's something that I wish I had learned so much earlier in my life, like the first day of preschool would have been great. (I would've been ok with learning it in grade school or junior high).
But the important thing is this. I learned it. I know it. And I live it.
That's all that matters, I'm taking action on it now.
And learning to love yourself and stop being so hard on yourself will actually will make building that healthier version of you easier, faster and more enjoyable.
Too many of spend talking about how we “hate” things about yourself. It’s like that scene in Mean Girls when Lindsay Lohan’s character is watching The Plastics stare in a mirror and complain about all the things they don’t like about themselves. I love the audio we hear of Lindsay Lohan saying “I didn’t know that there could be so many things wrong with you…”
And when you think about it, when you’re born that’s exactly what you believe! That there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s only by listening to other people’s opinions or observing what’s cool, accepted or desired that we form opinions about ourselves.
So today, I want to address how to stop beating yourself up and fall in love with who you are.
Because believe it or not, that’s the key to happy life. It starts with what you believe about yourself, what’s possible for you and how you should be treated.
So let’s dive in.
Your first step.
Begin by making a list of 20 things that you are doing well in your life. It can be in your job, your relationships, boundaries, personal care, with your kids, anything.
Don’t stop until you’ve written down all 20 things. Stretch yourself to think out what goals or victories (big or small) that you’ve accomplished.
You’re not the same person you were yesterday, you’ve grown and risen to challenges and situations in your life. Write down those 20 things that you’re doing well.
Your second step.
Look at your list. ReaLly, do it! Look at all the wonderful things you’ve done and do every day. It’s amazing, you’re amazing!
Rewrite all 20 of the things you’re doing well in your life and after each one write the phrase “and I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Say each one out loud after you’ve finished writing it. Take a second to check it with how you feel, is anything stirring in your stomach? Chest? Throat? Shoulders?
Is there any tension or resistance you’re feeling when you say these things out loud?
Your third step.
Learning to incorporate EFT into your life. EFT aka Emotional Freedom Technique, is a form of self-acupressure that helps to release fears, misbeliefs, anger, sadness, painful memories and other blocks. We use tapping to do it - you take two fingers to "tap" on different points of your body.
You'll start with two fingers tapping on the outside of your palm, right under your pinky.
Then move to your forehead between your eyebrows.
Next go to outside your eyebrow.
Then under your eye.
At the base of your nose.
On your chin.
At your collarbone.
And finally under your armpit.
As you tap on each point, you’ll say each of those 20 things out loud with the phrase “and I deeply and completely love and accept myself”.
Afterwards take a deep breath and shake it out!
Your fourth step...
Is continuing to grow from here. I’m going to challenge you to tap once every day for the next 7 days. If you really want to learn how to love yourself even if nothing changed in your life, then I encourage you to follow through with this challenge.
Grab 3 sticky notes and write down the top 3 things that you are proud of yourself for doing (from your list) on each note.
Now put those notes on the bathroom mirror and tap on them every day when you first walk in to the bathroom.
After doing this for the next 7 days, either stick with those 3 things or switch them out for 3 others. Do this for the next 30 days and watch how your love and appreciation for yourself will grow.
It works, it really does work. But you have to put in the 2 minutes every morning to make it happen.
You’ve totally got this.
If you are struggling with creating those 20 things and want some help, I invite you into a 1:1 coaching session with me. It’s $97 for 90-Minutes where you’ll learn how to show up for yourself when it comes to loving exactly who you are. You can secure your spot here.
We’ll deep dive into what’s holding you back from embracing and loving who you are, build a strategy to release it and create an action plan for you to move forward. It’s invigorating, enlightening and fun!
It's your time to be your happiest, healthiest self.